In everyone's life there comes a time when you really have to consider the next step...for me these decisions are always exciting but also a little scary as well. When highschool was coming to an end, I had to decide where to go to college. After college, I had to decide where to live. When I was 28, I had to decide about getting married and buying a house. Then came deciding when was the right time to have a baby. All of these very important decisions and in all of these cases I appear to not have done half bad with my decision making. And now...it's decision time again folks...I am beginning to think about having another baby. When I think about this there is a large part of me that screams a joyful "YES!!! DO IT" but there is also a part of me that much more quietly reminds me that maybe, just maybe our family is perfect the way it is. I remind myself that I am easily overwhelmed, that I like time to myself, that I have enough on my plate with being a wife, a mom, and working full time. I know logically...that there are plenty of reasons not to have another child...but still in my heart of hearts I also know that its what I want more than anything. The joy and happiness that my son brings me is like nothing I have every known and I can't imagine not experiencing all of it all over again.
So, in my decision making, I have consulted with my husband, since he obviously plays a pretty big role in the whole baby making process. When I did this, he asked me to really think about what our lives would look like with another child. What our schedules would be, who would do what, how we would manage, etc. And honestly, it really caught me offguard because, quite frankly, I have no clue what our lives will look like. I don't even know where to start. So, I told him just that...but he insists that if I sit down and give it some thought I will come up with something. What to do, what to do...but sit down and think about it. I was telling my friend about this and she suggested I draw a picture of a family four for him. Clever. I came up with the idea of handing him a blank sheet of paper and explaining that it's impossible to predict what our lives will look like. Or I could challenge myself to sit down and really think it though because it does kind of make sense and it will likely help in the decision making process. I hate when he's right. Arrgggg.
I am going to be working on this assignment of sorts over the next couple weeks...so we shall see what I come up with. I do love to over analyze things and I do worry about all of the "what if's" so one would think that doing this sort of exercise would be something I would enjoy. Unfortunately, that's so not the case. When I want to do something, I want to do it. I typically don't want to sit and make sure it's the right thing to do...because if it's not I probably don't care...because I want to do it. Does that make any sense at all?
Nonetheless, I will approach this with an open mind and as an opportunity for personal growth...wish me luck!
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